Bible Study: Chapter 4 Self-Control

Continuing with the Bible Study on the Seven Virtues of a Godly Wife and Mother, this chapter pushed many of my buttons. Chapter 4: The Safety of Self-Control
Have you ever lashed out in anger at your child only moments after repenting from your last outburst? Romans 7:18-19 “I have the desire to do what is right, but not the ability to carry it out. For I do not do the good I want, but the evil I do not want is what I keep on doing”.
Self-Control conjures up words like drudgery, discipline, discouragement, and even despair. But we as Christians need to reexamine this virtue from a biblical perspective. Self-Control doesn’t just happen. We can’t adopt the indifferent attitude “let go and let GOD” and expect magically to become self-controlled. Self-control requires effort. However, development of this quality is not solely dependent upon us. We cannot acquire this virtue by our own strength. It is only as we cooperate with the power of the Holy Spirit that we will achieve self-control. Colossians 1:29 “For this I toil, struggling with all his energy that he powerfully works within me”.
God’s Word likens self-control to walls; or rather it informs us that not having self-control is like not having walls. Proverbs 25:28 “A man without self-control is like a city broken into and left without walls”. Self-control is our wall of defense against the enemies of our soul. We have the Worldly Theater, the Devil’s Theater, and most insidious of all – the Inner Theater. Scripture warns us that the world hates us (John 15:19) the enemy seeks to devour our souls (1 Peter 5:8) and our sinful desires wage war against our souls (1 Peter 2:11). These desires are deceitful (Eph. 4:22) they drag us away and entice us into sin (James 1:14).
The first step in constructing this wall of self-control is to acknowledge one simple yet hideous fact about ourselves: We like to sin! Hebrews 11:25 states, “ our enjoyment of sin doesn’t last very long”. Sin always leads to death (Romans 6:15-23). Sin delivers negative consequences not only in our own lives, but also in our relationships with others. We revel in the luxury of sleep, but we spend the rest of the day frantically trying to make up for the lost time. We exult in the brief moment of victory over our husbands, but we later regret the rift we’ve created in our marriage.
Undisciplined use of our bodies will hinder our service to GOD. For example, the amount of sleep we get-whether too much or too little can interfere with our daily communion with GOD and ability to care for our family and home. 1 Corinthians 6:12, “not to be enslaved by anything”.
We are to eat and drink to the glory of GOD (1 Corinthians 10:31). First and foremost, we are to receive our food with thanksgiving (1 Timothy 4:3-5). It is a gift from the one “who richly provides us with everything to enjoy (1 Timothy 6:17). Proverbs 23:20-21: “Be not among drunkards or among gluttonous eaters of meat, for the drunkard and the glutton will come to poverty, and slumber will clothe them with rags”. Proverbs 23:2 recommends drastic measures if we struggle with gluttony: “Put a knife to your throat if you are given to appetite”. Food is not the source of help and comfort. He wants to teach you to comfort yourself not with food, but with His comfort. “Charm is deceitful, and beauty is vain, but a woman who fears the LORD is to be praised” Proverbs 31:30. We must not chase after the ideal our culture worships, but instead pursue what God esteems. Example: A girl that orders a salad at lunch because she wants a figure that will attract attention of others. She is pursuing self-glorification-not godliness.
Sleep is a gift from GOD. Scripture says he grants sleep to those he loves (Psalm 127:2) and He makes our sleep sweet (Proverbs 3:24). Sleep is a sweet restorer of physical strength. He is the creator and we are the created.
Maybe our temptation related to sleep is not to get too little but to get too much. Proverbs 20:13 “Love not sleep, lest you come to poverty, open your eyes and you will have plenty of bread”. Martha Peace wrote: “I have heard of women pride themselves of being “night people”. These women are not “night people”. They are lazy and selfish. Who would not rather stay up late to do whatever they pleased and sleep late the next day”? As wonderful as our thoughts and feelings may be, they also have been marred by sin. Because of sin, the way we think and feel is often contrary to what Scripture commands. What we allow to govern our feelings and occupy our thinking will sooner or later determine our behavior. Sinful thoughts and sinful feelings lead to sinful behavior. 2 Corinthians 10:5: “Take every thought captive to obey Christ”. As we encounter life, our emotions are primarily determined by what is in our hearts. Sinful feelings reveal a sinful heart. The story of Hannah verifies this fact 1 Samuel chapter 1. We must choose to be wholly and completely dependent upon Him. As our LORD says: “Apart from me you can do nothing” (John 15:5).

Ignorance is Bliss: I guess

I got back from Ft Worth in one physical piece but my heart has been shattered. While I was up there a so called friend of mine drove up from Houston to surprise me. The morning was starting off a little rough. Logan and Kendra didnt sleep well the night before and I was beat. Logan started throwing a fit when I wouldnt pick him up while I was doing my make up. My friend asked me what was wrong. I proceded to update her about him being in day care and me being in school. She stopped and glared at me and said, "How could you put your sinful selfish desires first and sacrifice your children's well being?! Arent these suppose to be the most important years in your children's lives?!" I had no idea what to say. I was completly thrown back. I thought about living right there and then but then I realized we traveled all this way, Im not about to leave now and upset Kendra. It ruined my whole trip!! Considering she doesnt know my situation, She has no idea what we are dealing with. I thought that was extremly rude.
After the kids and I drove back home from Ft Worth (a 10 hr drive) I only had more rude comments made about me. We got back in on Saturday night. We got home about 8 pm and I was in bed by 9pm. The next day was Sunday. We went to church and my mom's house for lunch. I got home and started on my cleaning from the week before. Note to self, ask the husband to clean up after himself while the wife is gone. Come 9pm that night, I get a text from my "so-called" BFF asking me if I was gonna make time for her on this trip. (She was coming down to visit the same week I was out of town. Funny, I told her that. Must have slipped her mind.) I said it was too late for me to go out and plus I had a ton of cleaning and laundry I had to finish. She then went on to say that she came all this way and I couldnt make anytime for her and that she was "done". Whatever that means. I guess she was telling me that she didnt want to be friends anymore. Its funny how single and childless people dont understand what responsibilities are. Yes, I didnt call her as much she would have liked. No, I didnt she her as much as she would have liked when she was down. But the truth is I tried my best. Im sorry that I decided to go back to school and had class every night of the week last semester therefore, missing almost every episode of last season's Grey's Anatomy (which was when we both would watch and call each other during commerical break). She doesnt like it when I call and the kids are screaming in the back ground or when I call her during work. But yet, she cant seem to understand when she called me after she got off work, I was making dinner or bathing kids or putting them down to bed. I cant leave the house after 9pm because Im tired and I dont want to leave Aaron with the kids on a weeknight. Weekends are hard because that is time Im taking away from my family. I guess, Im not such a great friend after all. It sounds like I put my family before everything else. Shocking! Who does that anymore?! Truth be told, I was getting tired of her always making me feel bad about something. Either, my kids were brats or I wasnt spending enough time with her or I wasnt sleeping with MY husband enough.
I was so excited about our trip last week only to end up being judged. I knew it was gonna be a hit and miss thing with the "BFF" while she was down. I guess ignorance really is bliss. They have no idea what I have to do on an everyday basis. My life and body are no longer my own. Im sorry if they dont agree with that but I frankly dont care anymore. I done with trying to make other people happy. My FIRST priority is to my family. All others do come last. If you were a true friend, you would understand that. Funny, how all my other friends get that simple concept.

Feminine Appeal: Seven Virtues of a Godly Wife and Mother

I am loving this bible study that we are doing at the FBC. It really has opened my eyes to the way Ive been going about things. I feel completely renewed. I want to share some of what I have been learning. For legal purposes, I will be quoteing word for word from the book. The author's name is Caroline Mahaney.

Transformed by Titus 2: Chapter 3 - The blessings of Loving my children

"Quit it!" "MOM!! She is touching me! Make her stop!" "Get over here this minute!" "Dont make me yell at you one more time!"

How many of us have heard that or said that before? I know I have on many occasions. Motherhood can be both exhilarating and exaperating. It can present us with a delightful experience one minute and baffle us the next. Our perspective of motherhood should not be defined by our diverse experiences & flucuating emotions.
Yet it's in the midst of trials and challenges of motherhood that the command comes to love our children. We are to love our children with Phileo (tender, affectionate and passionate) love. A sacricfical and dutiful love. We are to delight in our children.

"NO job on Earth takes more physical, metal, social, emotional and spritual strength that being a good wife and mother. If a woman is looking for an easy life she might try tennis. There is nothing easy about good mothering. It can be back breaking, heart wrenching and anxiety producing. And that's just in the morning." - Stephen & Janet Bly

Because mothering requires constant sacrificies, the temptations to resentment, complaining and self-pitty are always close by. I was so focused on the sacrificies that I had failed to appreciate the daily pleasures of raising my children. We can either resent the challenges and demands that accompany motherhood and persist in our selfishness, or we can draw from GOD's grace and receive HIS help to cheerfully lay down our lives for our children. [Matthew 20:26] If we set aside our selfish desires, and joyfully serve our children, we are glorifying GOD. That is the greatness according to the Bible.

But what if we lose our joy to sacrificially serve and love our children? Our only genuine source of refreshment comes from GOD. How do we do this? Luke 5:15,16 - Withdraw and pray. With everyone coming to mom for needs, remember to take time alone to spend with GOD.

Beware of Indulgence/Discipline
We must never beome tolerent of sinful behavior in effort to enjoy our children. [Proverbs 22:6]
"Far better that children should cry under healthy correction, than that parents should afterwards cry under the bitter fruit to themselves and children of neglected discipline." - Charles Bridges [Proverbs 13:24] avoidance of discipline is an expression of hate not love.

Love
What are some words that come to your mind when you think our your children? Work, responsibility, sacrifice, burden, more work? [Psalm 127:3,4] [Psalm 128:1-4] The psalmist describes our children as heritage, fruit, reward and arrows. "Blessed is the man" Love consists of insignificant activities. It includes faithful prayer and encouragement or small gestures of kindness.

Number our Days
Our children are only young for a very brief time. [Psalm 90:4-6,10,12,16,17] Our goal is not that our children be happy, fullfilled and sucessful. Our highest objective should be that our children would repent from their sins, put their trust in Jesus Christ and reflect the Gospel to the world around them. Only the Holy Sprit is able to reveal the truth of the gospel. Our tender love can be an instrument in GOD's hands. I am convinced that no one has more potential to infulence our children to receive and reflect the gospel that we do as mothers.
Responsibility and Grace
2 Cor 12:9 (grace and power) * Not one of us is equal to this task of mothering, but HE will help us in our weakness.

Like I said, Im learning so much from this study. I pray I become the wife and mother that GOD wants me to be. I pray that he works in my heart and through my hands to love Aaron and my beautiful children. Thanks to Christy Hill for leading this study. She is truly and inspiration to me and one of GOD's angels.

Venting

It kills me to think you can even start to justify pretending to care about your kids when you did what you did!! How could a true mother do that? Then take a "break" just to be selfish and go to bed at night thinking you are a good mom. And dont lie to yourself saying you dont sleep good at night because Im sure you drink enough to make sure you sleep. Especially knowing you dont have to get up with them the morning after. oh, thats right, someone else has to because you chose to walk away from the most precise things in this life you will ever be given. I, like many other REAL moms, bust our asses everyday, day in and day out, caring for our children. We all have had season's when we wanted to call it quits. But what makes me so much better than you is that I chose to stay. I chose to let GOD lead me and work my heart with his loving hands. You are were you are because of yourself. GOD didnt let you down. If anything he blessed you with one of the most WONDERFUl people I have ever had the pleasure of knowing. And you just threw it away. For what? I hate to say it but you deserve everything you get. Everything! Heartache more than anything. If you even have a heart at all. You are a terrible selfish person and dont deserve to call yourself a mom or wife for that matter. The only reason you can pretend you are worth anything is because those kids father lets you still think you would be a half ass mom and wife at best even on your best day.

These are a few random family pics. I havent had much time to update so here is my best effort tonight.

Why being baptised is so important to our salvation

Under the old law (while Jesus was still alive) people were to make sacrificies for the forgiveness of sins. ie. Theif on the cross. Luke 23 verses 32-43 *Christ said the word "paradise" not Heaven. SO while Christ was alive he had the power to save and heal.

In Hebrews God promises a New covenant. Hebrews 8:6-13. I found Hebrews 9:7-10 to be a berif explanation of how the old covenant worked. When Christ died, his ultimate sacrifice became a Will for us as Christians. Hebrews 9:11-17 * verse 24. Hebrews 10:19-22 is good reading also. It refers to pure water, but still a water baptisim.

1 Peter 3:18-22 * answer of good conscience toward GOD

John 3:1-13 *story of Nicodemus (Ruler of Jews)

Matthew 3:13-16 * If Christ thought it was important for himself to be baptised why should we not?

Lastly, with out baptisim, we are not walking as Christs commanded. *Pretty clear command for baptisim is found in Acts 2:38 thru 41.

I had never read this before today, sadly but in Colossians 2:6-12 gives us as Christians some rules or guidelines to live by.
1.) The way I read this was read verse 6 then read verse 12. Repent for sins and be Baptisted.
2.) verse 7: strengthened in faith to know the difference between false doctrine and the true word.
3.) verse 7: overflowing with thankfulness
4.) verse 4: after being baptized you were dead in sin because GOD made you alive thru Christ.

All this brought me to Acts 10:14-48

** Also, if Paul was chosen to do GOD's work, why was he instructed to be baptisted before all else after his incounter on the road to Damascus to be filled with the Holy Ghost? 1.) sight 2.)baptisim 3.)holy ghost. In order for Paul to start his journey he had to be baptised. I recommend reading all of Acts chapter 9. Its long, but it great reading.